Writing Exercise: The Trauma Recovery Process
Judith Herman, in “Trauma and Recovery: Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence--From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror”, speaks to the importance of ownership and empowerment over our own trauma story. She underlines the trauma recovery process as being comprised of 3 distinct stages.
Safety and Stabilization: those who have experienced trauma may not feel safe in their surroundings, in different situations that remind them of the trauma, or in certain social relationships. Emotions may feel heightened and difficult to control, which can wreak havoc on accomplishing everyday tasks. The first step in recovery is to just allow ourselves the space to feel safe.
Remembrance and Mourning: once we feel safe, we can begin to process the trauma. The aftermath of trauma sometimes feels as if a mask is lifted off the world, as if harsh realities about the world seem obvious and unavoidable. Our former way of life feels forever lost to us. The important thing to do here is explore and mourn the losses associated with the trauma and providing space to grieve and express emotions. This can be effectively done through writing, creative processing, or discussing with a therapist. It’s important that this is done at our own pace, with safety in mind.
Reconnection and Integration: Trauma is an isolating experience. It makes us feel we are alone and no one could ever possible understand or hold enough space for everything we’ve been through. One of the best healing agents for post-trauma is connection. We need to reconnect with other people and also with ourselves. It may feel some days that we don’t even know who we are anymore. When we are ready, we can begin to see ourselves in a new light, with a new sense of self and a new sense of the future. The traumatic experience is no longer the thing that’s in the driver’s seat. It may be something that we integrate into our life story and help it inform decisions in the future, but it does not control us anymore.
Writing exercise:
With the above stages in mind, think about where you may be in your own personal trauma recovery journey.
If you are in Stage 1, spend some time tuning into your emotions. What are you feeling, and how does it affect your body? What are your needs? How can you carve out space for yourself to feel these emotions and let them be calm? What tools do you have? If you were to imagine a “safe room” for yourself, what would it contain? What would the temperature and lighting be? What would you hear? Imagining yourself in the room, how do you feel once you are inside?
If you are Stage 2, spend a little bit of time writing about your experience. Make sure to slow down or stop if you feel yourself becoming emotionally overwhelmed. What did you feel in your body as it was happening? What did you think about? What things did it make you believe? Identify one thing that changed as a result of your experience- be it a belief you had about yourself, a life change, or anything else. How would you explain this experience to someone in your life? What advice might you give to someone who has experienced something similar? If you were to write a song about your experience, what would the lyrics be?
If you are in Stage 3, write a piece about your trauma. Perhaps you might like to give it a name and character. Perhaps you would like to integrate it into a larger creative writing exercise. Always remember: Safety first. If you feel yourself becoming emotionally overwhelmed, slow down and come back at a later time.